Happy October! Welcome to my favorite month of the year. Today dawned cool and a little foggy. I’m taking that as an auspicious sign of a good month to follow. This month will mark six months since the break up and big transition. I believe things are finally starting to settle down in a lot of ways. We got the bureaucracy out of our lives, which is nice. No more worrying about UAs and home visits, which to be fair weren’t that bad, but just more items on the daily to do list that now don’t have to be done.
E is doing better in school, seems more motivated. Conversely, or maybe corollary, he may be becoming a bit un-enamored of football…at least with the coaching staff this year. They continue to want him to play quarterback, and he does, but he doesn’t care for the position, especially since they don’t pass a lot (he’s got an arm on him, this kid does), but when they let him play wide receiver (which he wanted), there are so many in the rotation, he doesn’t get much playing time. This is all from him. I don’t go to practices and only one game, since the majority so far have been out of town and on Saturday. Last week, I had to have them at the school to get on the bus at 5:45 AM!! That worked for me, as I just got off work and took them, but oh my goodness, that’s early for teens!
In any event, he’s doing his homework, trying to keep up better on a daily basis and actually asked me if he could apply to a program called Upward Bound which will help him with his school work and possibly allow him to take college classes while he’s still in high school. Well, DUH! Of course! That was very encouraging, trust me.
I think I’m getting a better handle on trying to map out a couple of weeks’ worth of basic menus that make it easy for me (if a little boring) and keep everyone happy and fed. Something Mexican (tacos, burritos, etc.), something Italian (spaghetti, baked ziti, etc.), some kind of casserole with hamburger or chicken, something like chili, pizza every couple of weeks, baked chicken, etc. I finally figured out how to cook pinto beans the way he likes, and of course, green chile. I says he won’t eat leftovers, but if I heat them up a couple of days later, he doesn’t seem to notice. Plus, I am working on downsizing things. Casseroles are now in an 8 x 8 dish instead of 9 x 13. I have been eating the leftovers for breakfast, which suits me. I buy small amounts of veggies for me, and quit worrying about trying to serve a side dish with meals. The KISS method works! Thinking in terms of a week’s worth of menus makes things easier to plan.
In other areas, I’m trying to add more sleep to my day. For two days last weekend, I deliberately took a 1.5 hour nap shortly before I was was due to start work. I almost always try to do this, but rarely succeed. I felt so much better on those days and then the other two days I was busy and didn’t manage. I definitely felt a difference. I know that I probably won’t ever sleep seven or eight hours in a row, that’s just not me. However, I can add more sleep, if I make it a priority.
Also, working on adding fifteen to twenty minutes on the bike right after I get back from taking the boys to school. I get to watch whatever show I missed the night before and break a sweat at the same time. Two days in a row. We’ll see what happens over the weekend with the work schedule, but again, the title of this is “Little by Little” not “Fixed All At Once.”
Finally, for the last couple of days being out and about, walking, getting in and out of the car, etc., I have noticed that I seem to be having less pain in my lower back/hip areas. My left leg is still falling asleep after I walk or stand for a while, but the overall pain of really tight muscles and connective tissue is less. I haven’t been doing anything special, but I think the clenched feeling I had in my life the last few years in the house is finally starting to relax. In fact, I never even thought of myself as “clenched” until I just wrote that sentence, but I was. I know I was. I was sort of in a defensive mode all the time, trying to justify everything I did that wasn’t something she would have done or something that she didn’t think was “productive.” I don’t even know how I got there, but letting go of all that feels really, really good.
Little by little, the changes are happening. October will be a good month to celebrate.