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Hard to believe, but this week a year ago, I hurt my shoulder really badly at a hot springs. I finally feel like my entire upper body is getting back to normal. I’m swimming again, up to a mile, and half-heartedly looking for other possible open water swims to do. Keeping that in the back of my head. On the not so good side, my left hip decided to go south on me, but I have found an excellent massage therapist and now that I have a little more discretionary income, I’m trying to see her twice a month. It makes a difference. And I’m worth it, to coin a phrase.
In June, E will have been with us for a year. I find that nearly impossible to believe. I feel like this year has crammed at least two or three years’ worth of activity, angst, and arguments in it. Although things are calmer now, there are days when my head just spins with confusion about everything. I find myself drawn more and more to Buddhist readings, to meditation (even though I find all kinds of excuses not to do it), and trying to go with the flow. I’m trying not to get into disagreements with G, even though there are times when certain situations literally set my teeth on edge. She would probably snort at this but I really am trying to release the need to be right, to have things my way (because my way is always the sensible way, of course). I won’t lie. It’s hard as hell. Dammit, I like being right. But, in the long run, it won’t really matter all that much, because E will go off and live his life and we are going to have to figure out how our lives will re-converge as a couple, and who won what argument four years ago won’t matter a hill of beans. I really, REALLY have to keep telling myself that, especially on the days I want to run for the hills.
Also, we’ve started volunteering for a pretty cool organization. G found them on FB, and so far we have housed a dog overnight and taken him on one leg of his journey to his new owner, and in a week or so, we will be fostering another dog (an Italian greyhound) for a while until a forever home can be found for her. E really, really wants a dog, but we are not up to owning another one, so we thought that it might be a way for him to get to care for other pups and learn about other breeds (he’s kind of hung up on pit bulls).
E starts weight room/football practice June 2. They barely finish school and whammo. I hope this summer will keep him exhausted and in line. I don’t mind trucking him around for it, even though I anticipate that will become a bone of contention as well, since the high school he wanted to go to is the farthest away from our house (Pueblo distance, it’s maybe 7 miles). But those contretemps can wait untill they arrive. I don’t have to anticipate anything. I’m learning that day by day.
Let’s see what happens this year…